☆“What’s your name, son?”a principal asked his student. The kid replied,“D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.”
“Do you have a stutter?”asked the principal. The student answered,“No sir, but my dad has a stutter and the guy who registered my name was a real jerk.”
“你叫什么名字呀，同学？”校长问一个学生。孩子回答说：“校长，我叫大大大大卫啊。”
“你有口吃吗？”校长问。
学生回答：“没有，有口吃的是我爸爸，而给我登记名字的人是个混蛋。”
——HaiasiNoswad
☆We were watching this black magician, and he was good.
“Just watch this now, ” I said, “he’ll disappear into thin air and never be seen again and become famous and a mystery. “
“How do you know this?” replied my missus.
“I’ve just told him his girlfriend is pregnant, ” I answered.
我和妻子在看一个黑人魔术师的现场表演，他真的很厉害。
“你瞧这个，”我说，“他马上要在光天白日下消失，再也不会出现了！这一切都将变成未解之谜！”
“你怎么知道呢？”老婆问我。
“我刚偷偷告诉他，他女朋友怀孕了！”
——KIMJONGTRUMP
☆Our dog bit the postmen this morning and now they’re talking about having him destroyed.
Seems harsh. Surely they could just give him a different round to do instead?
我们的狗今早把邮递员给咬了，听别人说要把他处理掉。
没必要吧，不能干脆让他送别的片区吗？
——WTD#小修改
摸摸
我承认了，我其实拥有游泳运动员一样的身材
@仿生舔狗会梦见电子女神吗:人家这个身材能上奥运会 你呢
@就是恭喜大兜发财:被奥运上
猫猫行为：进来了想出去
一个育儿小妙招
原来如此
我会想你的！
【没品视频】当你试图偷一个老头的车
以前是“电子海洛因”，现在成了“精神鸦片”。
网游质量的下降可见一斑。
——haOFei
☆Only two years ago the stupidest people you’d ever heard of were flat earthers.
仅仅在两年以前，你还以为世界上最大的傻逼是地平说的支持者。
——br-z
☆Given that early humans were vulnerable to predators during sex, at some point in our history premature ejaculation must have been an evolutionary advantage.
鉴于远古人类在性交过程中更容易受到野兽攻击，所以在人类历史上一定有某个时刻，早泄是一种进化优势。
——myfreakhams
☆Your older self is probably mad at you.
未来的你可能快要被你气死了。
——dalekfromskaro
—End—
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