感情执著，必来自于前世怨仇
Emotional entanglement comes from a karmic debt from past lives
今生今世，亲怨也是无常的。
Even within one lifetime, friendship and enmity are ephemeral.
今天不共戴天的仇人，明天或许会变成志同道合的亲友，情投意合非比寻常，这种现象也不在少数。
Sworn enemies today could become friends or family members tomorrow, some even find they suit each other perfectly.These changes actually happen quite often.
我们前世最有缘的人，今生可能特别讨厌；
The person dearest to us in a former life could become the person we loathe most in this life.
今生中依依不舍的，却往往是前世的仇敌来讨债。
The person we are most attached to in this life could have been our worst enemy in a past life, who just wants to seek revenge on us now.
所以，依照佛理来观察，若对一个人感情上特别耽著，说明这个人可能曾是你的怨敌。
Therefore, viewed from a Buddhist perspective, your strong clinging to a particular person says that you were likely foes before.
常有年轻人问我：“我跟谁谁的感情特别特别好，我不能没有他，天天都想着他。
Young lovers often asked me, “So-and-so and I are deeply in love with each other. I simply can’t live without him, and I think of him every minute.
您说，我们前世是不是夫妻？”
Master, do you think we were husband and wife in our past lives?”
我总回答：“你们前世应该是怨敌。”
To this I always replied,“You must have been enemies to each other in previous lives.”
这不是没有依据的。
This answer is not groundless.
你今生中没他就活不下去，没他就要跳楼自杀，这种感情执著，必来自于前世怨仇的债。
Your emotional grasping, to be so strong that you cannot live without him and would rather kill yourself than lose him, is a manifestation of a karmic debt from former times.
汉地的《华严五祖纪》中记载：
The Han scriptureLife of the Fifth Patriarch of Hua Yan Lineagetells the following story:
唐代杜顺和尚，有一次到外面化缘，
When the eminent monk, Venerable Du Shun of the Tang Dynasty, was making alms rounds one day,
有个施主抱着儿子，求和尚给他消灾延寿。
a merchant patron brought his baby son and asked the master’s blessing for good fortune and long-life.
和尚定睛对孩子看了许久，说：“这孩子本是你的冤家，现在应该给他忏悔。”
The monk looked at the baby for a long time before saying,“This child has been your enemy; it’s time to do purifications for him.”
吃完饭以后，和尚叫施主把小孩抱到河边，将其抛入水中。
After his meal, the monk asked the merchant to bring his baby son to the riverbank and then proceeded to toss the baby into the river.
这时，施主夫妇捶胸顿足，号啕大哭。
The shocked parents burst out crying, beating their chests with great anguish when they saw what happened.
和尚说：“你们的儿子还在。”说完用手一指，
The monk said, “Your son is still around,” and made a gesture with his fingers.
结果小孩化为六尺丈夫身，立在水波之上，
At once, a six-foot tall man appeared standing in the running water.
怒目斥责施主说：“你前生拿了我的金帛，还杀了我推入水中。
He glared furiously at the merchant and scolded, “You were the one who robbed me of my gold and possessions, then murdered me by pushing me into the river to drown.
若不是菩萨与我解怨，我决不饶你！”说完就消失了。
I resolved to seek revenge on you forever, and would have done it, had it not been for the kindness of the master.” Having thus spoken, he disappeared.
且不说前世，即便是今生今世，亲怨也是无常的。
Friendship and enmity can change back and forth from lifetime to lifetime. Relationships can also change within one lifetime.
今天不共戴天的仇人，明天或许会变成志同道合的亲友，情投意合非比寻常，
Sworn enemies today could become friends or family members tomorrow, some even find they suit each other perfectly.
这种现象也不在少数。
These changes actually happen quite often.
世间人的感情变化，其实并不需要多大的事情。
It doesn’t take much to make changes in personal relationships.
他们建立感情也容易，给一点点财富，说几句好话，或者露一丝微笑，两人就能成为无话不说的密友；
By offering gifts, smiling, or saying a few kind words, a friendship is established quite readily, and two people can become each other’s confidants.
感情破裂也容易，
Likewise, breaking up is just as easy.
本来是难舍难分的亲友，只因中间出点误会，比如一方遇到困难时，另一方没来看望，或者一个人说话时用词稍有不当，对方就非常生气，从此再也不理他了。
A little misunderstanding (failing to immediately respond when one is in trouble, or the use of inappropriate words) can make others cross, producing rifts between close friends.
可见，无论亲友还是怨敌，都是无常变迁的。
Therefore, our relationships with friends or foes are transient.
这是事实，很多人从自己身上也能感受得到。
This is a fact that many of us have personally experienced.
既然如此，我们就不应贪爱自方、憎恨他方，
As such, let’s not cling to our own kith and kin and alienate others.
而应怀着慈悲的心肠，平等爱护所有的众生。
Instead, remind ourselves over and over again to treat everyone equally with love and compassion.
索达吉堪布《做，才是得到》
Khenpo Sodargye《Achieve by Doing》
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